Crazy Plane

Far be it from me to complain about someone’s kids, because I know that children are fundamentally flawed. Or, to use a clinical term, friggin’ crazy. Equally so, it’s rare that you would ever hear me complaining about someone’s parenting skills because I know that parents are fundamentally exhausted and confused. They’re just trying to find a little logic and reason behind why little Calvin thought that hammering nails into the coffee table was not only a good idea, but that his mommy and daddy would be rejoicing in the hallways at both his artistic achievement and his superior command of his still-developing motor skills.

All that to say, it takes a lot for me to really question a person’s parenting skills.

Monday night I was on a plane with a lady whose skills I questioned. Even as I write these words, I don’t think I can adequately describe what I saw and heard.  

It all started out with a little guy (maybe 2) freaking out because he wanted to sit on his big brother’s lap next to me. That’s normal—little bro wanting to hang with big bro. Well, big bro (maybe 7) kept staring out the window, obviously wishing little bro would just be quiet. This, of course, made it worse for little brother and he started doing something beyond crying. He was out of control wailing. Mom could do nothing to settle him, so instead she took the victim route and started to explain to him why he wasn’t allowed to sit with her brother—the TSA regulations, the airline rules, etc. This was done at such a volume it was obvious she was letting everyone on the airplane know it’s not my fault! I would love to let him sit with his brother, but the airline won’t let him! Sure, these behaviors are manifestations of a total lack of boundaries and discipline in our home, but it’s someone else’s fault! I kind of doubt the little brother understood anything she was saying because the wailing became puking. Yep. He cried so hard that he threw up. Three times. Then the mom started explaining how he does this any time he doesn’t get his way and how he threw up 5 times on their previous flight. She loudly explained that this is just an attention behavior that he does daily. I couldn’t tell if she was a hippie or a child psychologist. Or an alien from the planet MyKidNeedsToBeSpanked. Of course, she was telling this to no one in particular. In a darkly comic turn, the seven year old next to me then began explaining to me all the various things that could happen to make our plane crash and how if part of the propeller came off (we were on a small commuter plane) it could fly inside the plane and kill people. All of this was happening at the same time as the aroma of fresh vomit began filling the tiny fuselage.

This was all before we took off, mind you. 

(rw)

Comments

[Amy]

You just explained reason 6,456,345 why I made the decision to not have children. My list keeps growing!!

[Laura Anderson]

You just summed up morning drop offs (I do home daycare) with a particular little girl who knows just how to get mom to hang around at the door for an extra 15 minutes. Puking. Works every time. (Makes me want to throw a tantrum myself.) Funny thing is, the very second mom leaves, the little master stops crying and proceeds to be an angel for 5 1/2 hours...till mom returns for pick up.

Should I gift wrap "Dare to Discipline" (James Dobson) or just mail it to her anonymously?!