(I’m working on an article for Lifeway about community in the age of Facebook. The following is just me working out some of my thoughts. I promise I’m not this old-fashioned. I am a little. But not a lot. You may proceed.)
So, I got on Facebook. Finally.
I’d been fighting the process for a while because, quite frankly, there are some people out there that I’d just as soon not ever talk to again. I don’t mean that in a jerky kind of a way (maybe). I’m talking from a purely practical I-don’t-have-time-for-all-this kind of a way. I mean, come on. Really? Do you want to be reconnected, reunited, reintroduced to all of those meaningless acquaintances you’ve had over the years? Not me. Sure, if I was 18 or 24…or 30 even—maybe. But 40? I’ve met and forgotten literally hundreds of people. We all have.
When I was 24, that number was significantly smaller and manageable, for lots of reasons. One, I was younger and hadn’t met as many people because I hadn’t toured or been on the road yet. I’ve had 16 more years of meeting and greeting since then. But I think the biggest reason is that today’s technology wasn’t there keeping us connected.
Think about it: It was 1993. I had no email, no cell phone, I had to get my film developed at Wal-Mart, I had a cassette adapter for my portable CD player, and my Mac had a hard-drive capacity of what amounts to 20 hi-res photos. I was finishing grad school, student teaching, and writing for local paper and had go to the office to deliver my floppy discs to my editor. Today I’ve been writing for Lifeway for over a year and have yet to meet the two editors I work for. Convenient? Totally. Connected? Not at all.
I know I tend to write about this kind of stuff often, but are we really connecting with people? Or are we complicating our lives with minutiae? There are only a handful of people I’d really love to be reconnected with. And you know what? I’ve already “friended” three of them. So, in that sense, Facebook is doing its job for me. What I’m afraid of is that I’ll have to wade through about 300 other former acquaintances from high school and college to get to that prime dozen or so people I’d like to see again. Just because we went to the 1988 Harding University Groundhog party (Go Titans!) does NOT mean we should reenter each others’ lives. Plus, there’s a reason the disconnection happened in the first place. Maybe lots of reasons.
I think what’s happening is that there is such a lack of connection, such a lack of community, that it’s driving us toward these virtual social networks. One where you can’t see expressions, hear tones of voice, smell perfume or cologne, feel a hug, or share a meal together. Not one of our five senses are being used in the process. Is this connection? I don’t think it is.
That being said—I still joined Facebook this week. And I’m on Myspace and Twitter. I mean, sure, it’s amazing to see what folks are up to and there are constant surprises in my Inbox, which is fun. But I have to be honest…I’m going to be one of those people that doesn’t answer messages or write on “walls.” That is, unless I’m your husband or your uncle.
What’s hysterical about the whole process is that it turns out I already had a Facebook profile. It had been deactivated about three years ago from lack of activity.
(rw)
Hey Randy. I'm so behind the times...I got several Jeremy Camp CD's and just found out that you're his guitarist! I found out because my nephew (Eli Blakley) is going to be at Camp Electric. As I was browsing the talent, I saw your picture and recognized you...even though I'm one of a thousand friends who hasn't seen you in forever. I still might "Facebook" you anyway :-) Anyway, I'm happy things seem to be going very well for you. May God continue to bless your ministry!
Tom Gerber
Posted by: Tom Gerber | June 12, 2009 at 09:09 AM
I understand what you're saying about Facebook.I, too, resisted its advances for a long time. But I've come to enjoy logging on to see if there's anything funny happening out there. (I'm never disappointed. And some don't even realize they're being funny.) And there's a collective experience that's comforting. And, yeah, "re-connecting" is a strange proposition. It's like going to a class reunion and finding a specific place reserved "just for you."
Posted by: Agonistes | June 05, 2009 at 08:51 AM
Randy,
Don't you dare send me a friend request on Facebook....I will deny you!! HA HA HA However, if your lovely wife sends me one I will gladly accept!!
Amy (AKA- Angela's sister)
Posted by: Amy | April 30, 2009 at 10:04 AM
Hey, I was at that Groundhog party in '88 and in Titans too! But as you said if I tried to 'friend' you it probably wouldn't go so well. Actually I feel the same about Facebook as you do. I just haven't bothered to get set up and probably never will. I'll continue to let my wife make all the connections for us.
I enjoy your blog.
Take care and peace!
Posted by: That_One_Guy | April 29, 2009 at 05:48 PM
So, what you are saying is that if I ask you to be my friend on Facebook you would deny me??? Ok maybe not because I know that you are not plan cruel to your family. So, be on the look out for a request for friendship. Love you Randy!!! Let me know when you are in Dawg Town again...we can do lunch or coffee.
Posted by: Amanda Mohr | April 29, 2009 at 12:36 PM
Now that you've posted this, you're probably going to have to ward off the friend requests of crazy Jeremy Camp fans who saw you that one time back in 2005 in that one city at that one building with a stage. You know the one... Godspeed to you!
Anyway... Facebook is practical for me as a college student. I can get in touch with people in my classes that I don't want to give my phone number or address to. If I had to guess, I probably talk to 5% of my "friends" on a regular basis though.
Posted by: AmandaT | April 29, 2009 at 11:12 AM