Parenthetically Yours

Favorite Things Friday

It's been a few weeks since the previous FTF and I've come across some great things in that time...but I won't bore you with all the mindless details. Let me, however, let you know about one of my LEAST favorite things these days: Aer Lingus. What is that, you say? Sounds like some airborne fungus doesn't it? Well, it sort of is. Aer Lingus (or Air Fungus to the Brits) is an Ireland-based airline that lost six (SIX!) of our guitars last week while we were in Europe. Not only did they lose them, but they did nothing to find them. Thankfully a kind employee at British Airways did some legwork for us at London Heathrow airport and found them in Aer Lingus' possession with no destination tags anywhere to be found on them. So...a big YAY to British Airways and a big BOO to Aer Lingus.

Now, on to the favorites.

PORTLAND BREW's Ethiopian High Priest Blend - My favorite coffee. Yeah, I know I talk about coffee quite a bit from time to time here. But, this is the mack daddy, the smoothest, the ultimate cup o' joe. Portland Brew is my favorite coffee joint in Nashville (but we desperately need one in Franklin!). In fact, if you look up and to the left at the photo under the ABOUT section of this blog, that picture was taken at PB of one of their more masterful latte creations. They do coffee/espresso right and the Ethiopian High Priest is a blend of African, South American, and Indonesian beans that is smooth as silk, and dark as an African night. It's also their best seller. I'm sipping some at this very moment.

The PALM PRE - Yeah, yeah. I know. The new iPhones are out. I love 'em and I want one. But it just doesn't make sense for me to get one for several reasons. I got the next best thing. And you know what? I LOVE it! The only thing it's lacking compared to the iPhone is Apple's App Store. The Pre only has a few dozen apps available at the moment, but there are hundreds in the pipeline. The Pre is sleek, fast, small, and is incredibly intuitive when it comes to syncing with your calendar, iTunes, mail, etc. Believe it or not, there are a few things it does better than the iPhone. First, it's with Sprint, not AT&T. Second, it has a real keyboard, not a sketchy at best software-based keyboard. Third, it's smaller. Fourth, your $7/month insurance covers it. Fifth, no need for a separate, proprietary phone plan for it. My $94/month (unlimited everything) is all I need. Sixth, you can leave multiple programs open and switch between them...while on a phone call. Plus it has all the other goodies: GPS, WiFi, full web browsing, universal search, cut/paste, multi-touch screen, etc. Phones are NOT just phones anymore.

PROGUITARSHOP.COM - I'm not really expecting many of you to care about this, but whenever I'm looking for a new piece of guitar equipment, this is my first stop. They have a YouTube channel with over 400 video demos of guitars, amps, and effects. The videos are bare-bones simple but do an amazing job showing the products without falling into hyperbole or over-promotion (which is what I'm doing here). If you're looking for gear, begin your search here. Here's one of their videos demonstrating my favorite new pedal, the Electro-Harmonix Micro POG. (that's a birthday hint)

That's all this week. It feels good to be back. Now...y'all come back.

(rw)

Hi Randy. Welcome to 2006.

(I’m working on an article for Lifeway about community in the age of Facebook. The following is just me working out some of my thoughts. I promise I’m not this old-fashioned. I am a little. But not a lot. You may proceed.)

So, I got on Facebook. Finally.

I’d been fighting the process for a while because, quite frankly, there are some people out there that I’d just as soon not ever talk to again. I don’t mean that in a jerky kind of a way (maybe). I’m talking from a purely practical I-don’t-have-time-for-all-this kind of a way. I mean, come on. Really? Do you want to be reconnected, reunited, reintroduced to all of those meaningless acquaintances you’ve had over the years? Not me. Sure, if I was 18 or 24…or 30 even—maybe. But 40? I’ve met and forgotten literally hundreds of people. We all have.

When I was 24, that number was significantly smaller and manageable, for lots of reasons. One, I was younger and hadn’t met as many people because I hadn’t toured or been on the road yet. I’ve had 16 more years of meeting and greeting since then. But I think the biggest reason is that today’s technology wasn’t there keeping us connected.

Think about it: It was 1993. I had no email, no cell phone, I had to get my film developed at Wal-Mart, I had a cassette adapter for my portable CD player, and my Mac had a hard-drive capacity of what amounts to 20 hi-res photos. I was finishing grad school, student teaching, and writing for local paper and had go to the office to deliver my floppy discs to my editor. Today I’ve been writing for Lifeway for over a year and have yet to meet the two editors I work for. Convenient? Totally. Connected? Not at all.

I know I tend to write about this kind of stuff often, but are we really connecting with people? Or are we complicating our lives with minutiae? There are only a handful of people I’d really love to be reconnected with. And you know what? I’ve already “friended” three of them. So, in that sense, Facebook is doing its job for me. What I’m afraid of is that I’ll have to wade through about 300 other former acquaintances from high school and college to get to that prime dozen or so people I’d like to see again. Just because we went to the 1988 Harding University Groundhog party (Go Titans!) does NOT mean we should reenter each others’ lives. Plus, there’s a reason the disconnection happened in the first place. Maybe lots of reasons.

I think what’s happening is that there is such a lack of connection, such a lack of community, that it’s driving us toward these virtual social networks. One where you can’t see expressions, hear tones of voice, smell perfume or cologne, feel a hug, or share a meal together. Not one of our five senses are being used in the process. Is this connection? I don’t think it is.

That being said—I still joined Facebook this week. And I’m on Myspace and Twitter. I mean, sure, it’s amazing to see what folks are up to and there are constant surprises in my Inbox, which is fun. But I have to be honest…I’m going to be one of those people that doesn’t answer messages or write on “walls.” That is, unless I’m your husband or your uncle.

What’s hysterical about the whole process is that it turns out I already had a Facebook profile. It had been deactivated about three years ago from lack of activity.

 

 (rw)

Where Do You People Find the Time?

I meet with a group of guys every Tuesday morning for breakfast, coffee, and a little spiritual/creative/career inspiration. It’s never too heavy and is one of my favorite appointments on my calendar. Good guys. Funny guys. There’s only one issue: I can’t keep up with them.

Every last one of these guys blog, they Twitter, they’re on Facebook and/or Myspace, and they run marathons and triathalons, or race motorcycles (or all three). On top of all that, they have jobs that require travel, meetings—and occasionally—work.

[Editor’s note: if you’re over 35 and aren’t familiar with Twitter, think of it as mini-blogs (140 characters or less) that are sent and received in a variety of ways, but primarily via one’s Twitter home page and/or text messages.]

I just can’t figure out where they find the time. I blog and I Twitter, but trying to come up with something witty and wonderful to say every day is like getting blood from a turnip. Twitter is a little easier, given the smaller word count, but trying to keep up with everyone else’s messages (twits) is too exhausting and having Twits directed to my phone is totally annoying. Who wants their phone blowing up all day with inane comments like "going to the gym to run a million miles. Still sore from all those push-ups yesterday." 

I’m sure Twitter (like every other social networking flavor-of-the-month) is supposed to make me feel like I’m part of a bigger, more inclusive, global society—but honestly, it just makes me feel like I’m either not working out enough, not living as glamorous as others, or that I'm missing out on everything.

But I’m NOT missing out on anything…that’s why I don’t like being told that what someone else did last night was the one event NOT TO BE MISSED. For example, last night I assisted chef Katie in the kitchen (we grilled fish and veggies and baked about four dozen homemade cookies), watched American Idol, helped her with some sorting for work, and scanned through some things on the DVR. By most anyone’s estimation, that was a good night. A great night, even. By a simple review of last night’s messages, though, it turns out I missed Ben Folds’ hometown show, the jam-packed, epic debut of The Civil Wars (another friend’s band), some sort of game night I wasn’t invited to, a friend’s appearance on FOX news, and a general invite to dinner with a big group of friends.

So now I’m oscillating between Eyeore (sigh…I wish I was cool) and smug (you all just wish you were married to such a cool girl). Neither place is a happy place.

And while I’m ranting, let’s be honest for a sec. Twitter is supposed to make us all feel connected, right? But really, so many of those I’m “following” just use it as a forum for inside jokes and @namedropping. Yeah, yeah…I know you’re friends with Tina Fey. I’m sure you’re really close.

UNPLUG America! Read a book. Watch a movie.

I know I’m going to. First, though, I’m going to send @StephenColbert this hilarious photo I took of me and @TinaFey imitating a donkey and an elephant. It wouldn’t make sense to you, but he’ll totally crack up. I need to call him back as soon as I get back from my mid-morning workout. 

(rw)

Favorite Things Friday!

Well...one of my favorite things is college football...and sadly, it's over. I'm so torn because on one hand, I CAN"T STAND the Florida Gators. Yet, I love Tim Tebow and the SEC...so, I'm caught in this tension of elation and frustration. I was rooting for OU and Tim Tebow. And, if OU had been playing Texas for the National Championship (which should've happened), I would've painted myself burnt orange and donned a longhorn helmet.  It was all very confusing and left me apathetic to the entire BCS process. 

This week, Katie and I attended an amazing marriage seminar by Dan Allender. It was sponsored by Al Andrews and Porter's Call, a ministry for artists and musicians here in Franklin. It was disturbing, frustrating, revelatory, beautiful, and mind-splittingly amazing. Thank you Al and Dan for messing up things! It's already had an effect in our marriage (in a great way!). 

Finally, for all you techy-geeky folks out there, this isn't so much a favorite thing, but a favorite possible thing. There are many rumors out there that Apple is going to introduce a large version of the iPod Touch (maybe Macbook Touch?) later this year. Basically, it will be a fully-functioning tablet (meaning, no keyboard) computer. For those of us who travel so much, we can leave our clunky laptop computers at home. Oh...the joy!

Until next week...here's a favorite quote:

An immature man will die nobly for a cause while a mature man will live humbly for one. - JD Salinger

(rw)

Where am I?

What is this thing here? Oh…yeah. I have a blog. Sometimes in the hustle and bustle of the season, one can forget what really matters. Important things like peace on earth, goodwill to men, the Christ-child in the manger, and blogging. Not necessarily in that order.

Yeah, it’s been a little busy at the Williams homestead. We’re putting the finishing touches on two Christmas projects, both of which require a great deal of work. Nothing difficult, just time consuming…and no, I will not go into detail regarding the above-mentioned projects because they’re gifts and some of the recipients check this site out from time to time…so GET OUT! I’m trying to wrap presents in here.

To further complicate things, I left Tennessee last Wednesday to be the tour rep for Compassion International on the Point of Grace Winter Wonderland tour. I’ve done this all four years the girls have done this tour, so here I am again. In fact, I met Katie when I was on this tour in 2005. She was helping out when the tour came to Denton, TX and my heart jumped a little as if it recognized an old friend when I saw her. The rest is history, but not necessarily her-story.

Well, my friends, the morning is waning. We’re pulling into Wichita and I need to get back to work on one of the above-mentioned projects. It requires the use of a pretty intense photo-editing program that was designed to be used with newer computer technology. Let me just say that in computer years, a five-year old laptop is 118 in human years. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak. But…we do what we can, we soldier on…but not before putting my head through a dozen walls waiting for photos to upload.

…it’s the most wonderful time…

(rw)

Home Recording for Idiots, Morons, and Dummies (like me)

For me, trying to learn intense recording software is like setting down and trying to start (and finish) War and Peace in a day. In Russian. In Braille. The learning curve is—how do you say?—steep. Steep, as in, Mt. Kilimanjaro is steep.

It’s something I’ve been meaning to do, though, for eight years. That’s slightly on the pathetic side. I was in my early thirties when I got my first recording equipment. It was a portable device that had everything you need, built right in. No need for a separate computer, so went the sales pitch, just plug in and record. Not a problem. That seemed simple enough. Oh yeah, there were about 1,300 buttons, knobs, faders, levers, and pulleys crammed onto the 14x20 surface around of the machine. I broke all kinds of child labor laws hiring various toddlers whose fingers were small enough to hit the record button. Never really got the hang of that particular device.

Then I moved on to the famed ProTools software about four years ago. This too was an all-inclusive package with a small interface allowing me to get sounds from a guitar or a microphone into the computer (ahhh…the files are IN the computer). I bought a nice microphone, bought a little keyboard, mic stands, cables, speakers…everything to complete the set-up. Then I sat down to make my first recording. I double-click on the ProTools icon, wait a moment, and before I know it I’m hearing the faint whizzing and whirring of a hard drive in motion, all the while, unbeknownst to anyone (save maybe Steve Jobs) RAM was getting gobbled up like a Thanksgiving turkey at a homeless shelter. Beep. What’s that? Oh, it’s some sort of message from my computer. Let’s see. You should quit while you’re ahead. The road before you will be marked with despair, frustration, and expensive trips to a pro audio store near you (click here to find the nearest authorized ProTools technician). Uhmm. What? Actually it said something more along the lines of Gobbledy-gook blah blah technical words blah blah 01100101 etc BORING.   

Paralysis. To make a long story short, I used it all of 10-15 hours, and about 13.5 of those hours were spent looking through the PDF manual. I just wanted to hit a button and hear the songs in my head coming from my speakers.

So, anyway, I got the itch to record again a few months ago and hatched a plan. I dug out the old ProTools interface only to find out that while technology had continued to progress, my old software became completely inoperable. So…I decided to downgrade to an older version Apple’s operating system (nerd alert!). Turns out this older version was still too new for the old ProTools. In fact, ProTools didn’t even offer an upgrade from such an old version. Aargh.  This was gonna cost me deep if I went forward. Like, a lot of money. That would’ve meant less food and shelter for me. Nope. I like my roof and coffee. So does Katie. I’m not bowing.

After many sleepless soul-searching nights, some practical instruction by a friend who knows what he’s doing, and a new favorite (and less expensive) recording program, I’m FINALLY up and running. Well, if by “running” you mean “tripping every other step and spilling coffee all over my shirt while simultaneously running into walls, both theoretical and literal.” I’ve actually been able to get a few things recorded. They’re primitive, at best, but still sound better than pretty much any Pavement record.

Join me here tomorrow for another installment of Randy’s Favorite Things. ProTools will NOT be on the list. 

(rw)

RANDY'S FAVORITE THINGS

Hear ye! Hear ye! Friday's are becoming a whole new thing here at the ol' blog. Today I introduce RANDY'S FAVORITE THINGS...sorta like Oprah, except I'm not going to give you any money or free iPods. I'm just interested in turning people on to cool sites, music, companies, books, movies, etc. I'm spreading the love and hope you'll like what you see/hear/read/buy. 

I'm not sure how many of you are familiar with PASTE Magazine, but it's, without a doubt, my favorite. They cover every genre of music, film, and books, but only by people who have something substantial to say. You won't find the latest flavor-of-the-month music or big-budget movie release...but you will find the latest Griffin House or Wes Anderson offering. Their tagline is Signs of life in music, film, and culture. and it was started by these Christian guys in Atlanta who realized there was an entire genre and subculture of art going nearly unnoticed--that is, there's a whole lot of art out there dealing with Eternal and Universal themes. Great stuff, but it's usually pretty under-the-radar. Their point was and is to get this stuff noticed.

Well, one of my favorite new sites, www.noisetrade.com (started by Derek Webb and others) is offering a Name Your Own Price subscription to PASTE. You can get an entire year's subscription for as little as $1...or more, you decide. I signed up for $5. You can even renew if you're currently subscribing. Here's the catch: after the year is up, you will automatically be renewed for another year at the going rate of $19.99. Not a bad deal, in my estimation.  So, CLICK THIS for the Paste offer.

FAVORITE THING #2:

My favorite local music happening, Ten Out of Tenn has released their Christmas CD and tour dates. I'm not going to over-hype it too much because I did that already here. If you'll click the link to their Myspace site, you can hear many of the songs and find out how you can own it. This will be the most-played music this season in the Williams household. 

Well, except for our own little Christmas EP. You'll be hearing more about that soon enough. Let's just say my wife has a ridiculously great voice. 

(rw)

Bogged (and blogged) Down

You would think that after the previous post here, I'd have been a bit more concerned about getting newer content up here in blog world. That was the intention, at least.  As it stands, however, I'm bogged down in a technological sewage dump and can't get out.

Without getting all Geek-Squad on you, I installed an older operating system on my beloved G4 Powerbook (which is five years old this fall) because the newest Mac OS has been frustratingly slow on it...and I can't run my recording software on it. I got the old system (Tiger) installed fine. Protools works great. But nothing else does. Not Word, not iTunes, nothing. I may have even shut down the internet for about thirty seconds last Friday. Did you feel it?

So, all weekend I've been trying to figure out how to import (or even find) my contacts and emails AND since none of the updated apps work I have to reinstall the original versions of them--iTunes, iPhoto, Office, Protools, BLAHBLAHBLAH. On top of that, I'm trying to delete about 40 gigs worth of info. 

Sitting me down at the helm of this is like putting a monkey in a scrap yard with an acetylene torch and expecting the Eiffel Tower in 3 hours. In that three hours, all you'll get is a broken torch with monkey poop smeared across the tank. 

Let's just say this is taking a little more time than expected. 

(rw)

Death row, Steve Jobs, and other nervous ramblings

I don’t understand why I’m so nervous. It’s only a dentist appointment yet I feel like I’m sitting on death row awaiting my turn in the executioner’s chair. I’ve even come up with a few last words.

“I don’t belong to you, and you don’t belong to me—yeah, yeah. Freedom! Freedom! Freedom! You got ta give-uh whatcha taaaake!”

So, the best I’ve been able to come up with is lyrics from a George Michael song? That’s just pathetic. Oh well. I has elements of Braveheart in it, so it’ll do.

But yeah, I’m waiting on the couch to head down the street to the dentist. When I went three weeks ago (my first dentist visit in three years), they discovered that I have three cavities. They’re just going to keep an eye on two of them but the third one…well, it has to be filled now.

I haven’t had a filling in over 15 years so I’m hoping there’s been some technological developments that have made the tooth-filling industry quick and painless. Like, maybe Apple has designed something new to revolutionize the business. I’d love to hear that Steve Jobs keynote address. “We revolutionized computing with the Mac. We revolutionized music with the iPod and iTunes. We changed the cell phone industry with the iPhone. And now we’re taking it to dentistry. I give you iTooth.” Then he would go on to explain how teeth could be doing so much more than just chewing and crunching. The new iTooth would remove calories, fat, and carbs and electronically change your food at a molecular level to veggies and fruit. “We’re all vegetarians now! Except without the snobby opinions.” All the Apple faithful in attendence would cheer, they’d sell five million dentist kits the first weekend, and so on.

But, I’m afraid that’s not in the foreseeable future for me. Unfortunately, dentists are still in the dark ages; I’ll be getting a face full of novocaine and will be unconsciously drooling all afternoon. Unless, of course, Steve Jobs has something up his sleeve. He usually does.

I’d give my eye tooth for that.

(rw)

This post is FINALLY part of Watercooler Wednesday!

Knowledge is Power. Useless Power.

I have an older laptop that I use for everything. In fact, it’ll be a full 5 years old this winter. Technologically speaking, that's an eternity, but it’s doing fine for the most part. Last week, though, I had to comb through the hard drive and delete as much unnecessary information as possible to make room for some software updates. I was able to delete over 6 gigs of useless, random, or duplicate info leaving me room to spare for the updates.

If only my brain worked that way.

I have a LOT of useless information up there in the ol’ noggin and recently I’m feeling the need to comb through its hard drive and delete some uncessessary info because my memory is nearing capacity.

Just this weekend a friend and I were running an errand for his wife who needed 2 dozen 16 oz widemouth Ball mason jars and she needed ‘em quick. We left immediately for Wal-Mart which typically has one of everything. Not so this time. We got in the car, pulled out and I saw a Kroger across the street. “Hey, Kroger sells mason jars.” My buddy said, “How do you know that?” My answer: I don’t know. That is to say, I know, but I don't know why I know it. We ran in, went straight to the baking goods aisle and BINGO, 2 dozen widemouth mason jars. Full success, but it really bothered me that I had so much (any) information about where one could purchase 16 oz mason jars. That information should be relegated to grandmothers and, well, no one else really needs to know that. I know it though, yet I couldn't remember what street to turn on to get back to his house. 

Three days later I was helping Katie with a wedding she was decorating and we ran out of ribbon. We were under the gun and she gave me a piece of ribbon and said, GO! So I went. Straight to Target—because I know they have a wedding aisle within their party/crafty/giftwrap aisles (next to greeting cards, across from women’s makeup). I was back to the church in 20 minutes. Again: why do I know this stuff? I suppose the easy answer is because I’m a newlywed and I spent more time than any prospective groom should spend in that particular aisle. But how come I remembered they had spools of ivory polyester ribbon?

It’s like my brain unconsciously absorbs information I could care less about yet it has no ability to remember what time my dentist appointment is this week. That’s information I could use. Or it would be nice to know smart things, like how the dollar is doing against the Euro, but I can’t even remember the interest rate on my student loan.

I can’t remember the password to my gmail account, yet I know what song has been recorded more often than any other in history. I can’t remember my mother-in-law’s twin brother’s name, but know what time zone Indianapolis is in this month. Yes, it changes. Ask me. Why do I have to consult the menu every time I go to Peter’s Sushi? Is it the volcano roll or the dragon roll that I like? Oh, did you need to know where and when the world’s largest yard sale occurs? Good, because I know that. I would rather know the fundamental differences between Hinduism, Buddhism, and Confusionism and would rather not know all the original members’ names of Quiet Riot, Iron Maiden, and The Scorpions. Yet, I’ve managed to keep those facts intact.

I am a storehouse of the unnecessary, a treasure trove of the worthless.

I am the anti-Google.

(rw)